Home from work (the blog doesn’t make any money just yet) with the Cavs up 9. I expect a double-digit victory from the Cavs tonight. LeBron only needs to play a good game (as opposed to superhuman in Game 1) with 20+ from Mo Williams (17 pts on 6-20 in Game 1) and/or Delonte West (11 on 4-13) for this to happen. LeBron called it a must win. I call it a guaranteed win. Conversely, Dwight Howard simply needs to dominate. Although relatively limited offensively, commanding the double team and kicking out to the Magic’s plethora of shooters is their only shot in this game and series.
29.2 seconds, 1st
Horrible pass by Courtney Lee to Beetlejuice (more on him later) goes backcourt in a botched 2-for-1 opportunity. Pavlovic hits a soaking wet 3 to really rub it in… 30-16 Cavs after one.
(How gross is the axe commercial where the guy’s armpits spray everywhere? Andrew likes it, but it’s simply disgusting. I can’t even begin to imagine with what that would actually smell like.)
10:30, 2nd
Does Ben Wallace’s goatee have a mini braid in it? Drew Gooden would be proud. I’m convinced Gregg Popovich made Gooden clean up his act when he signed with the Spurs though. Usher sighting! I wonder if he and Dan Gilbert party. (Nothing but fouls going on right now, the Magic seem to be taking my advice of throwing it in to Dwight. The Cavs are hacking him though because, let’s face it, he’s no good at free throws. Time out with 8:51… I expect the Cavs to extend this to 20 before halftime. No one is playing particularly well yet on either team besides Dwight (creeping up on the 1st half double-double).
8:35, 2nd
Pavlovic with a beautiful hesitation dribble to the rim for a layup. That guy should be much better than he is. The contract hold-out didn’t help. He would be sweet on my Suns, hypothetically at least. Sasha with an even more beautiful drive and layup from practically behind the basket! Now I want him on the Suns. I’m an easy sell. Joe Smith for a contested 3—purrrrrre (Gus Johnson)! Timeout Magic, Cavs up 43-20 with 7:07 to play in the 1st half. I told you.
3:44, 2nd
Hard foul by Delonte on the 1-on-1 break against Hedo but called correctly by the refs. I am very sick of flagrants that are not flagrants. On a semi-related note, why does Dwight Howard get so mad when Charles Barkley pulls his virtual hamstring? The idea of Chuck playing video games tickles me.
2:00, 2nd
Two of the more graceful plays I have ever seen… both by LeBron. I won’t try to describe them, but both got me off my couch to throw my hands up in the sky. That guy could dunk from three-point line and I wouldn’t even care. LeBron does, however, need to shoot a better percentage from the free throw line. Period. Otherwise, he is categorically the best player in the NBA. Yes, you already knew that, but a coworker of mine half-jokingly said that Baron Davis was the 2nd best player in the league behind
End of 1st half
Lost among the LeBron James show was the fact that the Magic started playing better, including big shots/drives from Rashard Lewis and Hedo Turkoglu, respectively. Cavs only up 12 after being up 23 midway through the 2nd quarter. I expect the Magic to make a run (just like last game) with big 3s and offensive rebounding. Cavs outplaying the Magic in every statistical category and this time, the Cavs will pull it out easily in the 4th.
Some tangents:
I cannot stand James Harrison. First of all, he scored a touchdown in the Super Bowl that should have been called back… it completely changed the game. The ungrateful jerk goes on to wins the Super Bowl, receives the customary invite to the White House, but declines for literally no reason. Summary of explanation: “If the Cardinals had won, the President would have invited them.” Ok. A member of the media asked him about it again, to which he replied that he was not a devil worshipper. What? Finally,
Delonte West is sweet. Save for the tattoos, red hair, hilarious description of his dream date, potential appearance in an amateur porn, and all the familiar symptoms of oral herpes, I am the white right-handed Delonte West. That boy can shoot, defend, and dunk much better than it would appear. What’s not to like? Here comes the 2nd half…
6:16, 3rd
The Magic has just made their obligatory run, capped off with two threes in a row by Lewis. I am incredible at calling live timeouts on behalf of coaches. Kyle: “Timeout.” Mike Brown: “Timeout.” Dwight Howard is getting incredible post position (basically under the basket), forcing Big Z to immediately foul him. Luckily, Dwight has no moves outside of the charge circle, so they have to force him out. They have been doubling him, but that may very well bite them if the Magic shooters get hot. Doug Collins and I are on the same page, including his decision to stop bleaching his hair yellow. That was a rough patch in his career.
4:45, 3rd
LeBron’s 2nd outrageously powerful yet agile “and-one” in a row. Yucky. Not only is he the best basketball player on the planet (my friend Jeremy insisted he wouldn’t average more than 10 as a rookie… I suggested a wager, which was declined), but he would also be the best tight end in football, best shortstop/slugger in baseball, a sweet open-ice hockey player, and even an incredible goalie in fútbol. I’m convinced that he was created in a laboratory. UPDATE: Third ridiculous driving, 3 non-called fouls, power lay-up. Somebody help me understand. This man is a month younger than me.
Tangent:
“Over time, cable has a memory. Sometimes it wants to go this way, sometimes it wants to go that way… you just give it what it wants.” – Poignant, eloquent, and timeless.
He returns my iPhone cord in better condition than before. A man of many talents, that Ryan Saar.
Back to the game…
11:06, 4th
Only a 6 point game to start the 4th... my predictions means nothing. Beetlejuice give and go to Goran Sutton (or whatever the bald guy’s name is on the Magic) for the dunk! Another tangent, mid paragraph: Andrew and I were at the Suns-Magic game midseason (J-Rich’s first appearance as a Sun). Anthony Johnson’s nickname is listed as Beetlejuice and we can’t figure out why. After a brief brainstorm session, we realized it’s because he looks just like Beetlejuice from “The Howard Stern Show”. We laughed for 5 straight minutes.
9:33, 4th
Cavs are flat, Sasha Pavlovic (in this order) bricked free throws, got beat off the dribble by Hedo, then capped off a terrible flurry of extra passes by air-balling a 3… so much for the Suns trading for him.
6:40, 4th
Tie game. Courtney Lee is dirty. Rip
4:24, 4th
Mo with a JR Smith length 3!!! Monster shot. Hedo answers, then Z answers that. Zydrunas is perfect for this team. He might be more effective now than he has ever been, simply because he moves guys like Dwight Howard away from the basket on defense. I hope LeBron doesn’t jump ship in 2010… I like the makeup of this squad. Z dives on the floor for the lose ball and gets the timeout! This bad boy is coming down to the wire. (I’m praying for no overtime—I’ve got a date with a young lady and some delicious food waiting for me at a restaurant I’m not willing to pimp until I try it myself.)
13.6, 4th
Pavlovic with the most ill-advised foul in playoff history. I completely rescind my trade request… Hedo with a lefty drive to the lane for the pull-up. 2 pts. Are the Magic going to completely steal home court? One second left. Here we go…
…
…
…
Oh.
My.
God.
You saw the play. Cavs win. LeBron is super real. I’m literally shaking. We are all witnesses.
- Kyle
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